I Am..

I am

I am my people. The faith, obediance, disobediance, doubt and unwillingness to let go go. I am my people. The pride, arrogance, passion, humility and tendency to forget what was done just yesterday having been caught up in today worrying about tomorrow. I am my people. Multi-hued via multiple kisses of the sun and i love my wooliness. I am my people. Pain, agony and oppression seem to flow as easily as the river Jordan and once upon a time i crossed there within the loins of my forefathers as the sun guarded their rear. I am my people. Reared by the strength of my mother, i grew up within a world situated for me to fail and subtly so.. I am my people. Obstacles set forth before me n hopes (of the dark pursuasion) of failure when reality was victory and that more abundantly.. I am my people. I too engaged idols and readily worshipped them and even did my dance. I am my people. N my haughty ignorance, i rose up within myself and beleived myself to b a god and thought accordingly and as my people, was brought low and experienced chains behind which existed no physical being. I am my people and i now chuse to do what my people so long ago seemed to give up on: returning home. As i am them and they r me, perhaps my actions will speak louder than these words.. My people, i am..

Falsettos..

These hood mentalities lead to these hood type fallacies cause these youngstas and oft times ole heads desire to battle these.. truths.. But what r u proving and to whom does it apply?? The bark being bigger than the bite is a real sentiment when u consider the broader scope of life. People so busy caught up n their own worlds that they've failed to notice how irregardless of how unique they claim to b, they've long ago merged with the world having totally lost their identity only to become exactly who the world says they r: nobody special heading to an infinite flowing desert.. The sad part is that they dont even realize their error and many more dont even care.. These type folks dont even seem to want the truth because their attitudes wont accept it but there arrives a swift consolation prize.. N the end, all u will have r words and 1 last choice.. I pray u use it wisely...

My Declaration

My declaration

N this international sea of bodies, i refuse to become nething less than me. I understand the disappointment, dispair and longing of the afflicted. I recognize the cruel irony of those n authority. I sympathize and know, concisely, the seemingly never ending cycle n this journey called life. I comprehend the struggle of those suffering and i get it because my itenirary consisted of as much, however, i will not again lose myself to the top bottoms; never again. Its a truth when i say that ive lived at the bottom, lodebar, and even wallowed there n my self pity. Its a truth when i say that i was the sole authority n my life having deemed authority unauthoritative thus rendering them unworthy of my reverence. Its a truth when i say i found religion to b likened unto a kingdom, pure n its own mind only to b found to b the synagogue of satan n their actions because of their hearts. Its a truth when i say i spoke of destruction towards a destructive establishment being that they readily issued me, legally, the same decree. Its a truth that its not getting ne better and how can it when people refuse to pause? Within the midst of this seemingly endless sea of bodies, i refuse to lose myself. I refuse because ive only recently begun to discover.. now if u will direct ur attention forward u will now see the parting: 3 2 1..

Good Bye Old Friend..

The time had arrived for me to move on and so i had to. It hurt and tears even met my eyes but i was faced with a decision: u and the uncomfortableness that came affiliated with ur company or me and my future.. There once was a time, for comforts sake, when i chose u. I akinned our history to love and thought, amongst mortals, nothing higher but revealation set in and my eyes were opened. Its not so much that i saw u for who u were but rather who u were conflicted with who i was to become. And then u, appearing to know me, willfully pressed in upon me with ur reason of flesh amongst reasoners of flesh and i finally received that im not God. My powers have never consisted of external change as people go but rather those of persuasion and edification but alas, u used my compassion against me.. At the end of the day, i still love u and could never hate u but no longer will u dine at my table of my own dicision. Good bye old friend..

U, a god?

U, a god?

Is it not written that ye are gods? And yet we have the audacity to not only claim said stutus but we walk around with gas on our chest cause we caught all up n our pride. Whats up with that? R we really ready for that responsibility? Matter fact, r we even aware of what it entails? Going a little further, n our weak, incompetant mortality, after searching out true Godhead, will we honestly continue n our stark raving antics? To do so invites the ntense opposition of darkness and if u've not experienced this immediate response, ur n danger.. N laymans terms, ur n the camp of foe and thats a terrible place to b.. Sure, the money is nice and the power seemingly unsurpassable but a double edged sword is upon u.. U will know misery and woe here and should u not turn back, u will enter nto eternal turmoil and trust me when i tell u its real.. So ur left with a clear choice: Life or death.. Chuse wisely oh great one..iii

Just a few lines..

Just a few lines..

If u ever took the time to know me without reservation or preconceived notions, u'd find me to b an exquisite ill fitting anomoly, personable, but ill non the less. Y so? Since birth, i've worn chaos, bore confussion, supped with misery and frequently lay with woe. At first i didn't have a choice but as age ushered n knowledge, i honestly never knew the choice was mine and yet i refused to accept me as a loser.. I pushed harder, rode longer, bore more pain than many of my counter parts who n their simplicity, had the one thing i longed for: family.. C, they had a support system, even if only two or three while me on the other hand was negated to a mother who ousted herself from her ppl, siblings who were more my children than my brother and sister and a bloodline who ex-communicated me as if that was the most painful thing imaginable and for many moons it was. I wondered through this earth searching through every nook and cranny, leaving no stone unturned n pursuit of my happiness and only came up with a few morsels that would lead to the breakdown of the century.. I turned to ppl n order to feel validated. I turned to sex cause if it felt that good, maybe my worth would b reflected through consistent appreciation. I turned to weed because it revealed a side of me that had been caged n all of my life and to add unto that revealation came a window of opportunity for darkness to wage war against my immortal.. Then i turned to riotous living as i became a 21st century gypsy n the way of my ppl who were found wondering n the wilderness and were as nothing. As my beloved elders, i too was located.. U c, ill fitting becomes me because i never did quite fit the mold and if only u could c me u'd know i'm too damn big.. I am anomoly because i'm quite peculiar and am not here to b understood more than my need for love and acceptance as i am and so i receive u as u r.. Will u join a megar ole outcast as myself? I hope u will.. Lets get on with discovering this exceptional discover..

Long Story Short

They often stare and ponder me as if im some ill fitting anomoly.. I used to wonder about their reactions if they knew of my struggles: the snatching away of my innocense; the rejection from my bloodline; the lack of guidance from he who should've been there to hold my hand; the stronghold of that fuckin narcotic which altered my only source of provision; the abuse spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally; the absorbing of vapor through my cloth... i wondered if they would begin to understand or at least attempt, but alas, they gave not two shits.. they sought to destroy me, slander my name and they even robbed me of my livlihood.. and on top of that came forth the very forces that drove said people.. this darkness bogarded it's self nto my outer, inner most and sought to slay that special part of me and it drove me to the edge of lunacy. I grappled for many years with the immense pressures weighed down upon me night after night and no one ever knew due to my disarming smile, but that never stopped the pain i felt.. fast forward to today, i no longer give a damn what one may c because i recognize what i exude and that will have to be enough.. wonder no more young one..